
sasquatch_realism.jpg
Previously published in Poetry Is Dead, Issue #1
Dear Sasquatch
Stop avoiding me
I know you know I know you’re out there You know I know you know that Sasquatch Since you’ve been gone My houseplants have been giving me the silent treatment & my heartstrings all have fallen out of tune Since you’ve been gone The posture of my penis is just one more economic indicator with which to measure the health of the nation Shit! since you’ve been gone White people are getting whiter My balls are getting bluer & the 2010 Olympics are murdering your good name They’ve cutified you into Quatchi Teletubby of the British Columbian forest who wears ear muffs falls over easily & squeaks “Shop with Quatchi” But contempt is too easy I know you know I’ve sensed you out there Standing in line at London Drugs trying to buy a crimper and some scrunchies while everyone looks the other way except for the cashier who looks straight through you Sweet, noble Sasquatch Contempt is too easy Come back to me! I won’t apologize for the time I called your sister abominable But each night I will phone Grouse mountain asking them to blink out a morse code I Miss You with their ski hill flood lights Start a forest fire near Whistler if you feel the same I have biked down countless alleyways trying to read the calligraphy in the concrete for directions to your church of the invisible Bring me your shabby bible with its tissue-thin pages I will build us a home I worry though I worry that you’re right here & I’m just not looking quietly enough to see you I’m like the backseat brat on a cross-country drive constantly asking “Are we there Yeti? Are we there Yeti?” without ever looking out the window Dear Sasquatch I have no address for you So I’m reading this open letter at open mics I know it will reach you eventually You’re the kind of creature who comes to events like these & sits in the corner writing confessional poetry Sasquatch If you’re here Please stand up & tell us your story
Chris Gilpin Performs Dear Sasquatch Live:
Chris Gilpin has been a two-time member of the Vancouver Poetry Slam Team (2008 & 2009), the runner-up in the 2008 Vancouver Individual Poetry Slam competition, the champion of Vancouver’s 2008 Haiku Death Match, and winner of the Vancouver’s 2009 CBC Poetry Face-off.
Comments (1)
Comment FeedThank gawd ~ real humour
Anonymous more than 13 years ago